Grousing Day, Chapter 4

Chapter 4 – Sir Lagamorph

The quietest knight of them all is Sir Lagamorph.  The rabbits can make noise, but those ears make them great listeners.  Sir Lagamorph’s responsibility was to address the needs of the seed eaters and growers on the farm.  These creatures tend to get overlooked, and since many of them are prey to larger animals, they hide very well.   Sir Lagamorph let out a little whistle, and mice, voles, rabbits, and birds ran and fluttered into the tractor shed.  It was large enough to hold them all, but was not visible from above so the hawks and eagles couldn’t have lunch at their expense.   “Hi Everyone,” said the rabbit.  “I’m so glad you came to talk to me.  I will take your concerns to  Queen Agra, and since I’m a member of the Round Bale, I am safe from predators.  So what’s got  you all worried?”  A tiny field mouse raised his voice, “There are a lot of cats here.  I’m worried for my family. Can you make them go away?”     “That’s a problem, and one that we all struggle with.  As you know, we have a problem with gangs of rats coming onto the farm.  They eat  everything they can reach, even harming other animals.  The farmer’s cats are here to keep them at bay.  I know the farmer has asked them not to play with little residents, but cats will be cats.  Would it be helpful if she put a bell on them?”  There was a squeaky mutter that rolled through the crowd.  The little mouse nodded and added “Is that all you can do?  Cats don’t listen very well, yet they seem to hear us really well.”    “That’s the problem. Cats are cats, and hunting is what they do.  I will ask Queen Agra to speak with the farmer about belling the cats so it’s easier for you to avoid them. OK?”       “What else is worrying you?”     A chickadee jumped up and down, trying to get Sir Lagamorph’s attention. “Chickadee, What is worrying you?”    “The farmer has been really good about putting out bird feeders, which we very much appreciate.  But the squirrels and the bears are stealing our food.  What can  you do about that?”     “That’s another hard one. Lots of animals like birdseed.  They have a right to eat, too.  I will ask the Queen to bring it to the farmer’s attention.  Perhaps she can put up more feeders, or protect them, like the beehives, with an electric fence.  It is not the role of the Knights of the Round Bale to change the laws of nature.  We can only bring problems to the attention of the farmer. We all still need to use our natural skills to stay safe.”    The chickadee flew off with a “chick a dum, dum, dum.”  It seemed like she wasn’t very happy about the answer, but there’s only so much that the Knights can do.“Next?” asked Sir Lagamorph. It was quiet for a while.  The animals didn’t really think this was very helpful.  “ I know it’s hard to be one of the prey animals. I am too.  But if are any of you have problems with intruders?  With lack of food?  Water?  Those things I can do more about”  “ Water,” squawked a duck.  “We  don’t have as much water as we used to. The farm animals have blocked us off, in some cases.  There are some human neighbors who aren’t very careful with how they handle their water supplies.”  “I know,” Sir Lag said. “It has been a dry year, so puddles are harder to find.  We’re lucky our farmer has left our seasonal pools and streams alone, but without rain they are of little help.  I have heard the Queen say something about “climate change.” I’m not quite sure what it is, but I do know that the farmer is trying to keep us all safe from intruders and invaders. The farm animals are willing to share their drinking water, but they can be pretty rude about keeping it clean.  Would more buckets be helpful?  What about more plantings?”   The crowd filled with smiling faces.  They wondered what “climate change,” meant, but if the farmer is working on it, that’s the best they could ask for.  “OK, I think that’s everything, right?  If that’s true, then I’m going to let you go back to your safe spaces.  If something comes up before the next Grousing Day, feel free to ask for my help.  Thank you so much.”   With that, the animals skittered away, and the birds all took flight.  Even the grouse, who announced his presence whenever he took off.  There was some thought that it was his way of complaining about having Grousing Day named after him. He could have thought it as an honor, but he didn’t. He thought they were talking about him.  

This is the soap that started it all. This is the inspiration for Sir Lagamorph

Meet Sir Lagamorph